A great marriage can be heaven on earth but a bad marriage can be like a death sentence…
I have been married for almost 20 years but for both of us, it is our second marriage. My husband Robert is a wonderful man and I feel tremendously blessed to have him in my life. But when I think about our earlier years… Yikes, they were challenging!
When Robert and I decided to blend our young families, we were told that the failure rate of 2nd marriages was 75% but we were so in love, we knew we would beat the odds! We had similar struggles as other couples but adding issues that blended families face at times seemed unbearable.
At 7 years of marriage, I questioned whether or not I wanted to remain married due to a series of recurring arguments and behaviors. It was so bad, that I actually left my husband. My decision to leave woke us both up!
We just didn’t want to be married… We wanted to be “happily married.” We sought a Christian counselor who eventually asked us; “What do you want me to teach you… How to have a better marriage or how to have a successful divorce?” We chose how to have a better marriage and both made some changes.
The choice to remain together was truly made from our commitment to the original commitment we made in our vows… There were times I didn’t “feel” like giving in or compromising. But that question of “what do you want?” would always lead to me saying “I want to love and be loved.” So, if that is what I truly wanted, I needed to BE what I wanted to receive. I made the commitment to choose love and reconciliation over distance and discord over and over again. (I am sure Robert has done the same.) Eventually, we learned a new way to communicate and years later, we have created a wonderful love affair.
Ultimately, it is in our power to achieve “Happily Ever After” but many of us do not know what options are out there to help bring couples to a higher awareness of a more mature love.
Saturday, January 18, 2014, on The Lillian McDermott Radio Show, we will be discussing how to have the relationship of your dreams. Even if you are contemplating divorce, I want to encourage you to CLICK HERE to listen. Remember, if you have children, you will be connected to that person, your ex, for the rest of your life… You owe it to yourself to try everything possible to save your marriage! DISCLAIMER NOTE: IF YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP, PLEASE LISTEN TO MY 12-14-13 “LOVE SHOULD NOT HURT ” SHOW AND MAKE A PLAN TO GET OUT AS FAST AS YOU CAN!
If by chance, you have already made the decision to divorce and there is no turning back, we will also be discussing how to have a “Child Centered” divorce.
One last thought… It is so important to hold our marriage at the same level we hold “breathing”… Top priority and NEVER take it for granted!
So talk to me, listen and we will all learn together… The Lillian McDermott Radio Show ~ Saturday, from 12 pm to 2 pm ~ On “The Talk To Me Station” AM 1300 WMEL & Worldwide on www.WhenYouNeedaFriend.com.
Listen on your Smart Phone by downloading the USTREAM app… (Found on the homepage) Once downloaded, search for WMEL. It is that easy! 😉
I just read this while reviewing your page for a friend who I believe your page and words could help. I am so moved and emotional over you sharing this story, thank you so much. I want to get married so bad and I haven’t found love yet. I know that marriage can be difficult and I am afraid that some times I have an unrealistic view about what marriage is, but your story really put things in perspective for me. I pray that I am able to remain open and ready for the time when my husband appears before me and we have the strength to go forward and overcome through the hard times as you have done here.
Thank YOU Nina, you are so kind to not only take the time to share the site with your friend but also share your thoughts. You brightened my day!